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    Monday, March 29, 2010

    buat keycah jer lebih "agen"2 yahudi ni...

    Woes of polygamous marriages

    2010/03/28

    By Looi Sue Chern

    GEORGE TOWN: Polygamous unions are not all rosy or beautiful as claimed by advocates, but rather a practice with many complexities and underlying issues, often too personal and private for those in it to discuss in the open.

    A group of academicians and researchers from Universiti Sains Malaysia, Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia, Universiti Teknologi Mara and non-governmental organisations has revealed in a study on polygamous marriages that there are a considerable number of cases where wives have not been treated fairly by their husbands.

    The group, however, stressed that they were not trying to have polygamy banned.

    According to the group's study on 123 polygamous husbands from different financial backgrounds, 21 revealed that they gave smaller personal monthly allowance to their first wives and contributed less to their household expenditure after their second marriage, and 18 admitted to giving less money to their children.

    Out of the 128 first wife participants in the study, 59 said their husbands gave them smaller monthly allowance, 51 revealed that their husbands contributed less to their children's expenditure and 55 said the money from their husband for household expenses dwindled since the second marriage.

    The study's statistics then showed that over 60 per cent of the 110 second wives interviewed said they received enough money from their husbands for their personal use, children and household expenses. Only 10 per cent got more while 21 per cent received less than enough.

    Meanwhile, there were also more quarrels between the husbands and their first wives, with most due to stress or emotional impact.

    Most of the second wives said they never had arguments with their husbands while some of them said they sometimes disputed over financial matters, children and the giliran (roster), among other things.

    The researchers also found that 70 per cent of the 123 polygamous husbands interviewed consist of primary and secondary school leavers making less than RM1,000 to RM3,000 monthly.

    Sociologist Professor Norani Othman from the Institute of Malaysian and International Studies, who headed the research, said the figures presented a clearer picture into the lives of spouses in polygamous marriages, revealing that not everyone "lived happily ever after".

    The study found that in many of the cases, wives lamented that they were not aware that their husbands had taken another wife.

    In some cases, wives whose marriages were registered outside Malaysia in places like southern Thailand, were also concerned that they might not be entitled to claim alimony should their polygamous husbands divorce them later.

    Norani said for years, the question that had been raised was why there were no laws in Malaysia that could effectively and adequately protect the rights and interests of this smaller but no less significant group of women.

    "For more than a decade now, women rights NGOs have been lobbying for amendments to the Islamic Family Law (Federal Territory) Act 1984 (IFLA) that has failed to adequately protect the rights of Muslim women and children in polygamous marriages.

    USM's Women Development Research Centre director Professor Datin Rashidah Shuib said the study by the group, which assessed everything connected with the practice of polygamy, was timely as the issue was current and relevant, with certain quarters promoting the practice when existing policies were inadequate in protecting the rights of women and children involved in such circumstances.


    The study, she said, would hopefully help policymakers and women activists, find better solutions to problems arising from polygamous marriages.

    "Certain people have been talking about polygamy like they know all about it without hearing the voices of the women who are living in such problematic situation.

    "The society must know and understand what is happening in real life. So do policymakers, who must take steps to protect women, should their rights be violated," she said.

    The group, however, stressed that they were not trying to have polygamy banned.

    Norani said: "This has been used against us in the past by our detractors, who have given us various labels.

    "What we are truly fighting for are gender equality and justice for women."

    The group recently presented its papers and findings at the seventh International Malaysian Studies Conference at USM.

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